i waited way too long since my last entry! now i’ve got all kinds of crap to cover, absolutely all of it earth-shattering of course. first and least important - oops, i did it again… i started watching stupid programming on Mtv. “I want a famous face,” - truly disturbing, i mean these people are really fucked up. the first one i saw was about these twin guys who have a very unnatural attraction to brad pitt and a very unnatural relationship with each other. they had vaneers put on their teeth, nose jobs, cheek implants, chin implants, and one had something or other done to his jaws, i’m not sure what because i covered my eyes in horror during the nose job when they had a shovel shoved up the kid’s nose followed by repeatedly jabbing a scalpel in his nostril. i was mortified! and if i had been harboring any notion of getting my big schnozz “fixed” - forget that, i’m just gonna have to be stuck with it. anyway these boys, needless to say, did not turn out looking a damn thing like brad pitt, who by the way may want to beef up his security now that they intend to go to hollywood. in fact the after surgery hair & make-up make-over they got made a lot more of an improvement than the big bucks they paid to get mutilated. then i see this britney spears impersonator / wannabe get a boob job which made her look less like britney (not that that’s a bad thing) ’cause it made her look chunkier, and of course the fact that she didn’t have surgery to make her look 10 years younger was a bit of an over-sight if you ask me. the boob job was pretty harsh to watch too but not nearly as bad as the face stuff. Hey! its supposed to be ‘i want a famous face’ not ‘i want famous boobs.’ anyway now i have that stupid fucking song in my head, “oops, i did it again..” oh well, i guess i deserve to be punished.
but then i saw “pimp my ride” - oh my god, i neeeeeeed to be on this show! well, my car does anyway, i’m sure i’m at least 10 years older than the age limit to be on any Mtv production. but, my 14-year-old honda civic hatch-back, stick-shift, 117K+ miles, little-big car with the flashy little sticker that says ‘built for speed,’ deserves some major cosmetic surgery way more than some damn bleached blonde bimbo who wants d cups because she likes the same flavor of ice cream as britney spheres (i’m not kidding, she really said that she doesn’t just look like her, they actually have a lot in common, like ice cream and the color blue - isn’t that sad?) anywhoogolie..check out the before & after’s on the ‘92 honda they “pimped”
from this

to this

that is so coool! and my car would look so great with wings! i am so jealous! i want to “pimp my ride,” though i categorically object to the lingo.