it’s been a very eventful holiday around here.. the big blizzard, i got stuck in the snow on day 1 and got a tow from an eagle scout, so on day 3 when i was down to cereal and mac & cheese because i got stuck trying to get to the grocery store i called aaa at 7:30 am to get a tow to the tire place and they couldn’t even give me an eta for a tow truck, so we had no choice but to dig. it actually wasn’t too bad and i took a pretty scary drive to the tires place about 9:30 and left with my new bf goodrich’s at noon.
we headed downtown to go to our favorite asian market because we were totally out of rice which is totally unacceptable. the roads weren’t bad but there were accidents everywhere because people here in their big ass suburban assault vehicles think they’re invincible, there was even a pick-up on it’s side on the highway. so the 30 minute drive downtown took about an hour and fifteen minutes. then when we were leaving and i was pushing the shopping cart over the huge mounds of snow and ice in the parking lot acting like a dork i came around the side of the crv and was startled by a guy standing right beside the driver’s door. my first thought was that he was fucking with the car but he was startled too and said “uhh, sorry.” and walked towards me and then the full picture began to form in my brain as i realized the red stuff all over the guy’s head & face was blood! i asked him repeatedly what happened to which he just muttered stuff and i asked if he was ok several times too and he kept saying yeah. he had walked over to another vehicle to use their side view mirror - that’s what he was doing to our car, using the mirror to try and inspect his own injury. and in case you didn’t catch it the first time, he was bleeding, somewhat profusely, from the head!! in fact to be quite gratuitous it looked like he had been scalped! he had two large areas with no hair, no skin, just flesh, raw bloody flesh (i’m getting nauseous again just thinking about it). wtf, dude?!! so while m was fishing around in our basic first aid kit we keep in the car i was still trying to ascertain from the guy, “what the hell happened???” and “don’t you think you need an ambulance?!?” i had managed to ascertain that he was homeless and when i saw him use his filthy dirty stocking cap to try and clean his wound i just about passed out and told him he really shouldn’t do that because he needs to keep it clean and that i really thought he should go to a hospital and so i asked him if he wanted some water. he did take me up on that and i eventually got him to take some gauze and bandages and safety pins and a gallon of water. then m & i were both really freaked out, feeling woozy and felt like we needed to get out of there so we asked if he thought he was going to be ok and we got in the car. i had to be careful to avoid all the blood on the door handle, but once we pulled out of the parking lot i called 911 and gave them the address for the store that was on the receipt and explained the situation as best i could. the operator asked if he was conscious and i said yeah, he keeps saying he’s fine! she asked me what he was wearing and i said, “i don’t know… blood.” then a block down the street there were some paramedics loading up so we pulled over and told one of them about the guy, he looked almost as perplexed as we felt and said they would check it out. then we felt it kind of urgent to go and wash the blood off the car but because of the thirty inches of snow all the car washes were closed, so we had to settle for going to a gas station and use the sponge & squeegee used for windshields so i really soaked and scrubbed it. i feel a little bad for leaving him behind but i felt like we did the best we could without passing out and hitting my own head on the way down. it was all very traumatizing, and i think my punishment is the fact that i will never know how the hell one manages to scalp oneself. and i think i’ll have a bit more perspective next time i get a paper cut. i just hope the guy’s ok.

merrrrrryyy christmas!