where’s britney dammit?!? you can’t get me hooked on having updates on her downward spiral every 10 minutes then give me nothin’ for 10 days! i need to know!

and i knew that “Heroes” was going on hiatus, but April 23rd??! are you kiddin’ me?!! and after the best episode ever! and i don’t just mean the best episode of Heroes, i mean the best episode of television since “Alias” somewhere in season two - or maybe even since “Long Term Parking,” The Sopranos, season five. wow! i actually gasped in shock and/or surprise several times! it was seriously phenomenal! and now nothin’ for 7 weeks!! what is it with this season? shows go off for weeks even months at a time (hello, LOST, i’m looking in your general direction), come back for like 3 or 4 weeks, then nonthin’, poof, gone again. it’s like kids go to school now, constantly on break. does this mean that there won’t be a long, summer, break? yeah right!

speaking of a long summer… just when i should be able to look forward to drive-in movie season starting, check out Cinderella Twin’s website. good news - they open march 23rd! super, unbelievably bad news -

New Policy, NO PETS PLEASE.

dicktards! i am so unbelievably pissed off! let me list a few reasons why… (a) this is denver, you can take your dog almost anywhere. (b) it’s out fucking side! why can’t my dog attend an outdoor event? (3) there are cats running around everywhere, what the hell is the difference? hey, i might have just found a loophole - it says no “pets” not no dogs. Kylie is clearly no one’s pet! if they won’t buy that she is my kid, i’ll tell them she’s a stray like the cats, i just picked her up on my way in.
i am soooo calling them to complain, lots of people take their dogs, they’re going to lose money & we can still go to the 88 drive in, they only have one screen, but they’re already promising “Ocean’s 13″ and “Spiderman 3″!

ok and I’ve been told that I need to adjust my lists.. i need to swap and put dog the bounty hunter “On Notice” because i can and do still get sucked into watching this douche to see him slander hawaii and it’s fine citizens, and i live for news that he’s going to end up in a mexican prison; and i need to put criss angel on the “Dead To Me” list because at some point it stopped being fun even to make fun of him, plus they based an episode on CSI:NY on him, which pretty much puts that show on that list too even tho i never really acknowledged it to begin with. so consider them swapped. and here are some more additions for the big boards:

on notice:

• Heroes - just kidding! but 7 weeks??
• Brandon Routh - not kidding, he needs to do something, anything interesting. i’d be ok with him pulling a josh douchehandle and dumping his adoring little future wife/waif, to hook up with.. oh i don’t know…somebody bad for his reputation. not lindsay or britney, or fergie pee pants god forbid, but maybe somebody like ashlee simpson, or the olson twins. seriously! hell, even a nice girl like natalie portman, or reese witherspoon, or lance bass would be a step in the right direction as long as it was a sordid scandal where brandon was sneaking around behind courtney’s back or just dumped her ass overnight. and i don’t have anything in particular against her, but let’s face it as long as you’re happy no one cares and you will get no press, and no press is no press!
• Brangelina - kind of kidding. still love lust them both, and i know we need them to save the world, but stop being so goddam happy! seriously! how do you think it makes the rest of us feel about our empty, unhumanitarian, unattractive lives?
• Spring - it’s not time yet, we need more snow so just back off!

dead to me:

• daylight savings time - i’ve been wishing they would abolish it for like ever, instead it’s now starting early and ending late and causing a “mini y2k” wtf?! i may not even change my clock.
• cinderella twin drive in - unless they change their new policy
• arby’s - i don’t think i need to explain.
• Captain America - dead to me and everybody else. kinda seems like bad timing tho doesn’t it - morale wise? or maybe it’s just symbolic. poor guy.

btw, i’m in the middle of watching LOST and thus far the most entertaining part has been a DQ commercial for their ‘flame-thrower’ chicken sandwiches or something like that. i stopped the ffwd on the tivo too soon and just happened to see it and it was hilarious! good god this show sucks!