you have got to be kidding me! it’s just ridiculous how fast time goes by! so let’s not dwell on it shall we.

let’s see what’s been going on??… we’ve been to the drive in a couple times. once to see, i now pronounce you chuck & larry, which is a movie about how two homophobes learn tolerance for gays while making gay jokes constantly. i don’t know, maybe i just couldn’t get past adam sandler as (1) a hero fire fighter and (b) a successful man-whore who has a parade of women who looked like they just stepped out of hustler magazine in his apartment wearing lingerie. the whole happy gillmore gang was there, but adam may want to be careful casting kevin james as his supporting actor because kevin is waaay funnier than him. anyway, while i didn’t care for it and only chuckled a few times, our friend monica thought it was hysterical so to each his own. the second feature that evening at the lovely cinderella twin drive in which is becoming more of a dump every week was transformers, which was awesome again.

then we went to see the simpsons movie which was really, really, really funny! i had my concerns, especially when i heard it got its pg-13 rating for “full frontal nudity,” but even the split-second scene where you see bart’s “doodle” is quite well done. the second feature that night was the transformers, which was awesome for the third time, BUT then we got screwed. the very convoluted schedule for screen 1 on the website that night said that it was the simpsons, followed by transformers, followed on friday and saturday only, by harry potter and the chocolate factory or whatever.

now, i had previously never seen any of the harry potter movies. i had tried watching them once or twice on cable but fell asleep or found something better on at the same time that wasn’t three hours long, or something. however, we figured at some point due to scheduling at the drive in(s) we would end up watching it and didn’t want to be completely clueless. so a few weeks ago we had a muggles fest and watched all of them (except the second one, “chamber pot of secrets” i think, because it was not available), in one weekend. let me tell you.. that was a lot of warlockery! i had a british accent by sunday evening and was almost able to turn kylie into a fire-breathing, dragon dog with my magic wand which was really a wooden chopstick, which is probably why it didn’t work. but as it turned out scheduling did not require that we see harry potter and the order of the french fries, or whatever. in fact when they paired it with Ratatouille it caused us to have to trun around and go home because the line was literally about 10 blocks long and even tho we wanted to go to the other screen we didn’t want to risk a repeat of the fiasco that was opening weekend for disney’s “cars.”

anywaaaaaay.. because we are fully harry potter orientated now we thought we would get our money’s worth and see three movies for a change. we went prepared for a marathon 7-8 hour session, since transformers and harry potter and the sinister sequel, are both nearly two and a half hours. we took a ton of snacks & beverages, and m slept thru a big chunk of the transformers this time so she would be able to stay awake. then when the simpsons started up again, we were confused. i went to the box office to inquire about what i was sure was a mistake on their part. but nope, the plan was to show HP5 after they re-ran the simpsons at, get this… approximately 2:30 A.M.!!!

i asked the guy.. “so, the sun will be up before it’s over??” and the guy said, “you got that right!”

wtf?? what is the point of that? i don’t know who is running that joint but i think they’ve been hittin’ the pipe.

so needless to say (or maybe i do need to say because it’s not like we haven’t been at the drive in ’til dawn before) we didn’t stay. we considered showing up at 2:30 the next night just for the late, late, late, late show but really, we were never that into it. those movies are hard to follow, yo! there are too many characters with silly names and it’s kind of exhausting that absolutely everything has a magical element; the stairs move, the portraits talk, the candles float, people are constantly shape-shifting, it wears me out.

ok, that’s it for now. i still have to catch up on bitching about summer tv - in particular, dog & criss (i call tuesday’s “aneurysm night on A&E”) , and Ant on last comic standing (i want to set fire to his horrible toupee).