so a couple weeks ago, for some reason Brandon’s name came up which is pretty rare, even around here, and i was wondering if he had cut his goofy hair at some pint, so I checked brandonrouth.com for the first in i don’t know, a year. and his hair was in need of a cut but not completely out of control, and there he was with Kumar who was all dressed up in suit & tie at the premier of the Harold & Kumar sequel. and i was thinking that Kumar was thinking, thanks for dressing up dude, that’s a nice t-shirt!

so then as the stupid summer show “fear itself” was coming on and m was asking ‘why are we watching this stupid show, when we’ve already determined its obviously written by 12 year olds’, and i was saying ‘ask the tivo, it obviously has nothing better to do in the summer’.. i was wondering if Brandon was getting any work so i had gone to imdb and noticed he had an upcoming television guest appearance on “fear itself.”

what are the chances??

anyway, the episode is on tonight and i guess it can’t be any worse than the previous episodes, like the one staring eric roberts (yikes).

oh Brandon, i know its tempting and i know “Superman: Man of Steel” is still only at the stage of “announced,” but puhleeeeze don’t start doing TV movies, especially on lifetime!

SUPERMAN’S ENGAGEMENT RING MADE FROM STONEHENGE ROCK

Hollywood actor BRANDON ROUTH’s engagement ring is crafted from a blue stone he picked up at English historical landmark Stonehenge. The Superman Returns star, who is set to marry his actress girlfriend Courtney Ford “in a couple of months”, found the ideal rock for his engagement band during a tourist visit to the U.K.. He says, “The blue stone is part of what some of the stones at Stonehenge are made of. So the ring is from there but I got it encased in silver to strengthen it and it looks cool.” But despite his love for all things English, Routh insists he and Ford have no plans to wed overseas. Routh adds, “We’re getting married in the States. We’re not going to make anybody travel too far.”

————–

so i did some further investigating on the internet about engagement rings for men, cause before brandon i had never heard of such a silly thing. ironically all the info i found promoting the trend was on websites for jewelers.. go figure. they even suggest that after the blessed event the man switch the engagement ring to his right hand and of course wear the wedding band on his left.

good god! even tho i was calling it a man-gagement ring, i assumed it WAS the wedding band that he was just wearing prematurely. it didn’t occur to me that this was actually an additional piece of jewelry! dude, why not just make it a french mount diamond solitaire, and then after the wedding you can wear the wedding band on the same finger!! i mean who are we tryin’ to kid?

ok, perhaps i should interject here that i am not a fan of jewelry, pretty much of any kind, on a man (not even a huge fan of jewelry on women. a little is nice, but no blood diamonds for me). maybe it’s because of all the pinky rings and cheap gold chains intertwined in chest hair (gag) i observed in new jersey, but i just don’t get it. maybe criss streptococcus can explain it to me. i’m pretty sure his ridiculous Mr. T jewelry is a large part of why i hate the man so – that and the fact that he constantly calls it his “bling” (blehck). btw, Mr. T doesn’t even wear the jewelry anymore, he started feeling guilty after katrina so he denounced it. and while i can’t say i see the connection, i see his point. and for chrissake if he sees a problem with the overkill when it was his fucking trademark.. where the hell are the mindfreak’s image consultants? apparently they’re more concerned about his hair. but i digress..

anywhoo, i am now convinced that the mangagement ring is just a marketing ploy by the jewelry industry, that they’re no doubt advertising in all the brides magazines, bridal shows, etc. [god, can you imagine how many kabillions of dollars the wedding industry takes in per year? probably only slightly less than the country's divorce attorney's.]

i could not find one shred of evidence that this is some long-forgotten, long-standing tradition, or that its even socially acceptable for that matter. come on men, just say no! i have male friends who are married who don’t even wear a wedding band because they’re just not comfortable with it, or whatever.

so boys please, beware. they’ve already got you coloring your hair and spending way too much time and money on your wardrobe. it’s a slippery slope. mark my words, man-mascara is not far behind! remember at some point in the 90′s they tried to market the man-purse? but men reisited, so you must resist the engagement ring too! just tell your fiancee that if she wants you to have a mangagement ring, you’ll have to deduct the cost from the amount you were planning to spend on her ring. i assure you, she’ll shut right up about it.

but i have a theory about brandon’s ring.. that rock used in the band, it’s not from stonehenge – it’s from krypton! they deviously dyed it blue so he wouldn’t see the green glow that always gives it away, and it is continuously draining him of his… (wow, it seems really harsh to say testosterone or masculinity here, but i think you see where i’m going with this.)

regardless, i’m afraid he’s forever lost his super powers.

ps: just saw that Us magazine carried that interview too and elaborated that it took place at a party at Lance Bass’ house (and i’d have a joke for that, but i’m not that fucking funny!), and then brandon & courtney go on to talk about how they make each other breakfast.

dude, this is not going to help the box office #’s for the sequel!! please try and remember that for the time being you are superman, so you should stop being such the clark kent.

or maybe i should stop being so hard on poor brandon???

well, maybe, but it seems unlikely.

i’m not sure who to be jealous of… brandon because i can’t wait to see this movie, or the bots because they got to see brandon (even tho it was with the bad hair), or this hooker…

and of course brandon is still sporting his man-gagement ring, but wait.. what’s this???

it almost looks like she has him on one of those leashes that moms used to put on their toddlers in the mall. or is it a bracelet to prove he’s old enough to drink (cause sometimes it is hard to tell)? or did he escape from the psych ward to come to the premier? how odd…

so i looked at pics of other people at the premier..

josh douchehandle wasn’t wearing a leash or a man-gagement ring (oh yeah.. fergie dumped him. how embarassing). but it looks like he had a date with a dude (which might explain why fergie dumped him).

oh wait, that’s michael bay. he looks younger than i thought he would.

anywhooo… i can’t wait to see this movie! wait i already said that. but holy robots, it’s got a 100% from critics on rotten tomatoes!! granted there are only 7 official reviews and they’re probably all by geeky dudes in their 30′s, but wow! and it’s got 80% from users! (i’ll bet josh douchehandle’s performance is bringing it down) we’ll be seeing it in a theater, an actual enclosed, indoor theater where you sit in chairs not your car, but maybe not as soon as it opens. it may be the greatest movie ever but it’s not worth dealing with a bunch of teenagers!

in the meantime, we’ll probably be checking out John McClane (also getting surprisingly good reviews) and The Silver Surfer this weekend at the drive in.

honey, first you’ve got to get back to the barber!!

what the hell??? why doesn’t courtney do something about this??
they’re in china right now where brandon looks like a giant (a long-haired giant).

i actually watched superman returns last night for the first time in… eight months or so. i think i was jonesing for it because there have been commercials for it on cinemax on-demand, but i don’t have cinemax, plus there was a complete lack of anything rentable this week and as i mentioned the drive in schedules were not very accommodating. anywhoo.. it’s still fantastic & superman is still hot! but yes, brandon has let himself go. but whadda ya gonna do? it happens to the best of us, and he’s young and he’ll spend a few weeks, ok maybe months, in the gym and he’ll be back in super-shape.

ps: the funnier quote was from Steve Carell (which i guess is his job) when asked how to balance family life and a hollywood career: “I think highly caffeinated sports energy drinks are the answer.” maybe i should ask him what i’m doing wrong with the red bull!

and i haven’t had time to rave about HEROES, which was super-fantastic!! or even comment on The Sopranos which wasn’t super-fantastic but still, i like the way things are going. we are tying up all the lose ends, and tony is coming full circle from the first episode, when he referred to a guy who had failed to pay his debts as a “degenerate fucking gambler,” to having totally become one himself!

i also didn’t bitch about the horrible movies at cinderella twin – but who cares, 88 drive in is opening and they’ve added funnel cakes to the menu! FUNNEL CAKES!!!

i didn’t go on and on about how the current cast of survivor is truly the stupidest collection of survivors ever! not that this should be a surprise when their names are dreamz, mookie, and chachi, or whatever, but wow they’re just dumb. they’re like.. britney dumb..

speaking of britney, i didn’t even mention that she’s back and as bad as ever. badly dressed that is…

(seriously.. what’s going on here? is she homeless or is she a hooker?)

and last but not least, i didn’t have a chance to explain this

but alas those ships have sailed because now it’s wednesday night again, and wednesday night means LOST again.

god, i live such a full life! where’s my remote??

(along with this picture)

LONDON (Reuters) – Kryptonite, which robbed Superman of his powers, is no longer the stuff of comic books and films. A mineral found by geologists in Serbia shares virtually the same chemical composition as the fictional kryptonite from outer space, used by the superhero’s nemesis Lex Luther to weaken him in the film “Superman Returns”.

“We will have to be careful with it — we wouldn’t want to deprive Earth of its most famous superhero!,” said Dr Chris Stanley, a mineralogist at the Natural History Museum. Stanley, who revealed the identity of the mysterious new mineral, discovered the match after searching the Internet for its chemical formula – sodium lithium boron silicate hydroxide.

“I was amazed to discover that same scientific name written on a case of rock containing kryptonite stolen by Lex Luther from a museum in the film Superman Returns,” he said.

The substance has been confirmed as a new mineral after tests by scientists at the Natural History Museum and the National Research Council in Canada.
But instead of the large green crystals in Superman comics, the real thing is a white, powdery substance which contains no fluorine and is non-radioactive.

The mineral, to be named Jadarite, will go on show at the the Natural History Museum at certain times of the day on Wednesday, April 25, and Sunday, May 13.
————————————————–

no, it’s not out of sight out of mind. brandon may be gone from my blog but he’s not forgotten. but i have to say recent pictures of him like this do make it easier to shall we say, live without him.

that’s really unfortunate facial hair.

this one too

it’s a nice picture but the “boy engagement ring” is clearly visible. and here’s the problem with that.. boys don’t WEAR engagement rings! or did i miss that article in “whipped” magazine? oh brandon… i do miss you, you adorable dork!

and i knew that “Heroes” was going on hiatus, but April 23rd??! are you kiddin’ me?!! and after the best episode ever! and i don’t just mean the best episode of Heroes, i mean the best episode of television since “Alias” somewhere in season two – or maybe even since “Long Term Parking,” The Sopranos, season five. wow! i actually gasped in shock and/or surprise several times! it was seriously phenomenal! and now nothin’ for 7 weeks!! what is it with this season? shows go off for weeks even months at a time (hello, LOST, i’m looking in your general direction), come back for like 3 or 4 weeks, then nonthin’, poof, gone again. it’s like kids go to school now, constantly on break. does this mean that there won’t be a long, summer, break? yeah right!

speaking of a long summer… just when i should be able to look forward to drive-in movie season starting, check out Cinderella Twin’s website. good news – they open march 23rd! super, unbelievably bad news -

New Policy, NO PETS PLEASE.

dicktards! i am so unbelievably pissed off! let me list a few reasons why… (a) this is denver, you can take your dog almost anywhere. (b) it’s out fucking side! why can’t my dog attend an outdoor event? (3) there are cats running around everywhere, what the hell is the difference? hey, i might have just found a loophole – it says no “pets” not no dogs. Kylie is clearly no one’s pet! if they won’t buy that she is my kid, i’ll tell them she’s a stray like the cats, i just picked her up on my way in.
i am soooo calling them to complain, lots of people take their dogs, they’re going to lose money & we can still go to the 88 drive in, they only have one screen, but they’re already promising “Ocean’s 13″ and “Spiderman 3″!

ok and I’ve been told that I need to adjust my lists.. i need to swap and put dog the bounty hunter “On Notice” because i can and do still get sucked into watching this douche to see him slander hawaii and it’s fine citizens, and i live for news that he’s going to end up in a mexican prison; and i need to put criss angel on the “Dead To Me” list because at some point it stopped being fun even to make fun of him, plus they based an episode on CSI:NY on him, which pretty much puts that show on that list too even tho i never really acknowledged it to begin with. so consider them swapped. and here are some more additions for the big boards:

on notice:

• Heroes – just kidding! but 7 weeks??
• Brandon Routh – not kidding, he needs to do something, anything interesting. i’d be ok with him pulling a josh douchehandle and dumping his adoring little future wife/waif, to hook up with.. oh i don’t know…somebody bad for his reputation. not lindsay or britney, or fergie pee pants god forbid, but maybe somebody like ashlee simpson, or the olson twins. seriously! hell, even a nice girl like natalie portman, or reese witherspoon, or lance bass would be a step in the right direction as long as it was a sordid scandal where brandon was sneaking around behind courtney’s back or just dumped her ass overnight. and i don’t have anything in particular against her, but let’s face it as long as you’re happy no one cares and you will get no press, and no press is no press!
• Brangelina – kind of kidding. still love lust them both, and i know we need them to save the world, but stop being so goddam happy! seriously! how do you think it makes the rest of us feel about our empty, unhumanitarian, unattractive lives?
• Spring – it’s not time yet, we need more snow so just back off!

dead to me:

• daylight savings time – i’ve been wishing they would abolish it for like ever, instead it’s now starting early and ending late and causing a “mini y2k” wtf?! i may not even change my clock.
• cinderella twin drive in – unless they change their new policy
• arby’s – i don’t think i need to explain.
• Captain America – dead to me and everybody else. kinda seems like bad timing tho doesn’t it – morale wise? or maybe it’s just symbolic. poor guy.

btw, i’m in the middle of watching LOST and thus far the most entertaining part has been a DQ commercial for their ‘flame-thrower’ chicken sandwiches or something like that. i stopped the ffwd on the tivo too soon and just happened to see it and it was hilarious! good god this show sucks!

for example, this past weekend he attended the Spike TV Video Game Awards -geek!- not that I have anything against video games, i once went on a 5-day GTA:VC bender (that’s grand theft auto: vice city for you non-dorks)! video games are great, they’re good, clean, fun no matter how violent and inappropriate! HOWEVER as i have pointed out on numerous occasions, Brandon could use a little less clean. ok, he could use a LOT less clean! here he is at the awards ceremony.

ok, let’s look at him objectively… great hair, charming smile, nice eyes, put it together it adds up to HOT – in a boy next door kinda way and there’s nothing wrong with that because you know he cleans up nice (remember all those suits & ties during the SR premier tour – oh how i miss those days).

now let’s talk about the outfit objectively… the t-shirt i hear is some reference to “world of warcraft”, his very favorite game – uber geek! really all i know of warcraft is from a recent episode of South Park, but if those guys are making fun of it, it must be really geeky. and the vest.. oi-vay the vest. well, like, every guy in my 9th grade class had one like it because after the members only craze was played out (yes, i’m that old) it was all about the ski vest.

then there are the pics of brandon at the awards with “the cheerleader.”

by the way “Heroes” totally rocks! it’s the best show on tv since the first season of Alias (and since we all saw how that turned out i’m not going to rave about it any further). and seeing this picture it occurs to me that brandon probably absolutely loves “Heroes” too, which may be the first and only thing he & i ( or is it me & him ??) have in common. and it also occurs to me how cute this concept is, Superman could certainly “save the cheerleader, save the world!” and it also occurs to me that i’d much rather see pictures like this than of his frickin’ fiancee hanging on him – and there are plenty of those pictures from the event too. =P

so this picture of the tall, good looking guy with the ski vest on, with his arm around the cheerleader totally gives me a flash-back to high school when i had a crush on the tall, good looking guy who was dating the cheerleader – his name was brett btw, not brandon, but really what’s the difference. unfortunately high school was really not the best time in my life, and basically it’s making it very difficult to retain this infatuation, this fascination, this fully grown-up, rated R, fantasy. i mean eventually i got over brett, who’s probably divorced and bald and broke now from paying all that child support. =(

maybe i should just avoid brandon until 2009 when he’s back in the cape (sigh).. oh well, it was hot while it lasted. and brandon, if and when you notice that the skin on my blog has changed and no longer has your face plastered all over it, please don’t think it means i don’t love you anymore. we’ve just grown apart, so i just think maybe it’s time i saw other people(‘s pictures).

.. or maybe i should just watch my dvd again! i’ve been saving the “special features” for a special occasion – there’s a whole other disc i haven’t watched yet!

so what else is new?! it’s thanksgiving. let’s see.. what am i thankful for??? (in no particular order):

Kylie

LOST is on haiatus.

Britney is hanging out with Paris so that’s bound to produce some excellent photo ops like this one

Superman Returns is coming out on dvd next week

Brad & Angelina are making the world a better place

they’re giving Studio 60 the whole season

pumpkin pie

planes, trains & automobiles (i watch it every thanksgiving – just popped it in, in fact)

my few but true friends

LOST is on Haiatus

Brandon Routh

cute little furry faces like this one

and especially this one

last but not least, LOST is on haiatus!!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

he’s almost 40 for chrissake! 39 years and 11 months to be exact! he’s older than me!! (and that’s old) and here’s the proof…

holy hell – give that man some oil of olay! ok, i am done making fun of him for wearing make up because he really, really needs it! even if it does make him look like a woman! i’d rather see him looking like a woman than like the old native american guy from “thinner” with a bad dye job!

in fact i think i’m done making fun of him period. suddenly it’s not as fun anymore – not to mention even harder than before to figure out how he can be so in love with himself???

it was fun while it lasted, but i need to cleanse my pallet now…

[sigh] that’s better.

brandon, i can hold your spike for you if you need me too!

now i’m off to watch “The Fall Season Finale” of LOST. what a crock!! but i’m sure i’ll have more to say about that tomorrow.