It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine.

Six o’clock – TV hour. Don’t get caught in foreign towers.
Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself churn.
Locking in, uniforming, book burning, blood letting.
Every motive escalate. Automotive incinerate.
Light a candle, light a votive. Step down, step down.
Watch your heel crush, crushed. Uh-oh, this means no fear cavalier.
Renegade steer clear! A tournament, a tournament, a tournament of lies.
Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives and I decline.

It’s the end of the world as we know it.
It’s the end of the world as we know it. (It’s time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (It’s time I had some time alone) and I feel fine.
(I feel fine)

It’s the end of the world as we know it. (It’s time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it. (It’s time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (It’s time I had some time alone) and I feel fine.

The other night I dreamt of knives, continental drift divide. Mountains sit in a line
Leonard Bernstein. Leonid Brezhnev. Lenny Bruce and Lester Bangs.
Birthday party, cheesecake, jelly bean, boom!
You symbiotic, patriotic, slam book neck, right? Right.

It’s the end of the world as we know it. (It’s time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it. (It’s time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (It’s time I had some time alone)

AND I FEEL FINE !

(at least for tonight)

ps: no complaints or corrections please, i would never presume to know the lyrics to this classic so i looked it up and found more than one site that had the exact same words.

i didn’t realize so few people knew that but earlier this week there was a story on BoingBoing about denver’s own Casa Bonita and people lost their minds some because they have been there and have very strong opinions, but more because they assumed it was fictional. which is silly because all the South Park references i can think of are real. from South Park itself, which really is a small part of the small town in colorado called Fairplay, which is ironic because it’s identified on the internet as one of the country’s worst speed traps, which i can attest to since the first time i drove through South Park colorado i got a speeding ticket from officer Barbrady; to the fact that tom cruise won’t come out of the closet.

anywhoo, Casa Bonita is real and yes it is as wonderful as Cartman claimed and if i was a kid i might be tempted to lock Butters in a refrigerator for a chance to go.  because yes, they have puppet shows, and a wild west show, and strolling mariachi bands, and of course cliff divers – that’s right, cliff divers… inside the restaurant!! plus a gift shop, plus an arcade, with skee ball! it’s fabulous!!

ok, so what the strip mall it’s in has seen better days, so what it smells like pirates o the carribean – the ride, not the movies (the movies smell much worse! hahahaha!), so what the food is the equivalent of high school cafeteria mexican food, it’s about the experience!!

we’ve taken most all of our out of town visitors there over the last few years. those who have a sense of humor, and a sense of adventure truly enjoy it. one of them even liked the food! oh, and that’s not totally unreasonable – their free, unlimited sopapillas are sooooooooooo goooooooood! and you just have to raise the flag on your table and they’ll bring you a new, fresh, hot basket! i am not making this up! of course trying to get a long-time denver resident to go to “the casa” is a little trickier. i don’t know why.. you can sit and dine overlooking the dive pool, or in the villa, or behind the water fall, or in the cave with the stalactites & stalagmites, and have your characature (sp?) drawn, or have one of those old-timey photos taken, all while drinking margaritas! what could be better than that?

dude.. i just decided where my 40th birthday bash will be!!

ps: in the days since the Casa Bonita story was posted on BoingBoing the comments have kind of exploded. people are raving about how great it is; raging about how horrible it is; and reminiscing about all things nostalgic in denver – it’s pretty funny!

the big sign to the left reads,

WARNING
Baby Killing Women
So Called Christians
Porno Freaks
Muslims
Drunks
Homosexuals
Party Animals
Rebellious Women
Liberals
Jesus Mockers
Sex Addicts
Mormons

GOD WILL JUDGE YOU.
——————–

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Uh-Oh, i fall into four of those categories. oh wait… that last one says mormons. i thought it said morons so i technically only qualify as 3 of those things. i’m not saying which ones.

On the right:

Homo-Sex Is A Threat To National Security
———————————-

Wow! Really?

In the bottom right corner:

Computer Problems?
Call NERDS
—————-

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

don’t know about you but I find right to lifers way more scary than tanks!

holy crap! when i was younger and had more energy that would have just made me want to run out and get an abortion! now i’ll simply defer to my favorite bumper sticker – “against abortion? don’t have one.”

ugh.. is it over yet??

we found this blog by Ethan Persoff, boasting “Political Ephemera, Drug Hysteria, Vintage Sex, Health Items & Other Miscellany Delivered To You In A Timely, Inappropriate Manner Since 2001.”

well he’s in denver to cover the dnc and has a startling , to say the least, account of DAY TWO.

here’s an excerpt about the police surrounding and trapping a group of young, unarmed protesters because they left the “designated protest area”:

Finally, after the arrival of two tanks, hundreds more police, some snypers on the top of the Sheraton hotel, more gas masks, horses, cargo trucks, five helicopters — the crowd was released. And with them, the stories.
It’s difficult to know what is true and what isn’t, but I can trust the faces. You can tell when someone has experienced something truly shocking to their internal system. They begin to purge out information like they’re just trying to make sense of it for themselves. It was during a few conversations that I heard the most brutal stuff:
..”I saw this one cop – it was with a fifteen year old kid…. They scream for everyone to get on the sidewalk. This kid does what he’s told but the cop just still comes right at him with him billy club and WHAM, hits the kid horizontally … fifteen years old … right in the chest with the cane with something that looked like 80 or 90% of the cop’s body weight. This kid’s suddenly up against a wall and the cop continues to hit this kid eight or nine times.”

they also arrested three men separately believed to be plotting against obama, they haven’t said why they believe that, just that they had bullet-proof vests, rifles, ammo, walkie-talkies, etc. and one of those dudes was in aurora when they picked him up. oh yeah, did i mention?.. we’re actually in aurora (which makes up appx. the eastern 1/3 of the denver metro area.)

TANKS?! yikes! and obama’s not even here yet! that’s it, i’m staying indoors the rest of the week!

anyway we left downtown and got on the highway. i was in the center lane in the celica, there was an accident in the right lane, a bus pulled over in front of me so i couldn’t see the rather large, black, metal object in the road until i ran over it and got two flat tires! me and about 6-10 other cars, and since you only carry one spare we all had to call for tow trucks. we were actually lucky it only took about 40 minutes for ours to get there in which time we saw two foxes (which was odd because we were very much in the city) and are pretty sure we heard four gunshots.

regardless, we got home safely, but it reminded me a day several years ago when i found myself in three tow trucks in one day!

i was on my way to work at the mall when my civic died, the water pump broke. so i got a tow to our mehanic’s place. but i kind of thought i was in luck because m’s car happened to be there already because she had some minor repair work done. so i called work and told them what happened and headed in, but i got half way there and the clutch went out.

no way! so i call another tow truck and head back to harry’s (that’s our mechanic). he wasn’t going to rush to replace the water pump, but he made some calls and got one asap and i took off again.

i don’t even remember what happened that time, but you guessed it…

i know, right?! the really amazing thing is that i actually eventually went to work! i had to, i needed the money!

the question now is… how do you go and get new tires when you’ve got two flat tires??

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Yeah right, that would require a 99 year mortgage! but you must admit, these are fantastic!

(b) I KNOW !! i know it has been weeks, nearly months since i last blogged and i left up that hideous picture of, yikes, criss angel. i’ve been busy, ok? and i’ve explained before that sometimes i just get blogged out, and this has been a really bad case of blog-itis, ok?

it probably has something to do with the fact that i am still sooo not into celeb gossip, and i’m totally burnt out on the whole election debacle.

but as long as i’m here.. let’s see.. what’s on the menu today?…

oh, while i should issue an official thank you to the writers for settling their strike in time to bring back at least a few episodes of a few shows before season’s end. however, it’s somewhat too little too late, the damage is done. i am not proud to admit it but i am undeniably hooked on Rock of Love II, and i have to say the last two episodes have been stellar!

I thought the party was over when Angelique left, but then there was the ongoing saga of Kristy Jo. I was neither a KJ fan nor a hater, but I did love the way she had of pushing those hookers’ buttons! So when she left on her own terms (misguided though they may be) I said, game over, Kristy Jo just won! She really did rock Bret’s world and break his heart, because come on, neither of them are good enough actors to have pulled off that goodbye scene if it hadn’t been somewhat as Bret would say “heartfelt.” So the rest of those girls are now playing for second place at best! And Megan, left standing there with a slightly worse look on her face than she usually has (she always looks like she smells something fowl). I am a Megan-hater so this to me was priceless.

Then there was this week’s episode. If you haven’t seen it yet, you’re in for such a treat – we meet the ex’s! Best of all we meet Daisy’s ex, Charles, and never have I seen a couple more made for each other (except maybe Bret & Heather). And meeting Heather sooo makes me wish I would have been there for RoL-I.

So today we were reviewing info & opinions about the show on televisionwithoutpity.com, where somebody had posted stuff about Daisy & how she used to go by Daisy Graves when she was in her boyfriend Edward’s band, “Seraphim Shock” (yeah, i don’t know). the post went on to include part of an article about the band where Daisy said she was a stripper at Shotgun Willie’s and how they had opened for Poison at Fiddler’s Green and how CC Deville was trying to get in her pants. And I thought.. wait a minute, aren’t both those places (shotgun willies & fiddler’s green) in DENVER?!? So we did some investigating, aka googling, and found the article that they referenced – it was in WESTWORD a local weekly events & lifestyle paper. But let’s not jump to the obvious conclusion.. So we googled Seraphim Shock, and of course found their MySpace page, which is also good for a laugh, btw – it’s heading reads, “Seraphim Shock – Denver, Colorado.” HOLY CRAP, Daisy’s from Denver!!

I can feel the property value of the house I have yet to buy dropping (that’s why i’ve been so busy if you must know – house hunting, is very stressful.).

the Westword article described Daisy, whose real name is not Daisy De La Hoya (guess she’s not Oscar’s niece after all), OR Daisy Grave, but Vanessa Mossman like this :
“Beside him is Daisy Grave, the group’s new bassist, and she looks, well, kind of like Daisy Duke if she had died and been dug up.”

hahahahahahahahahaha! and that was before she fucked up her face!

And by the way, the article is from 2004 and Edward mentions that he is 34! And I’m not going to call that old because I was also 34 in 2004, but seriously?? Time to give up the dream, dude, lose the soul patch and the botox (and the wife beater and wrist band while you’re at it) and get a job!

Ok, I’m done with that for now, but look out because next week they’re going to vegas and throwing stuff at Daisy’s head apparently! I can’t wait ’til sunday!

speaking of kookiness in colorado, there’s been plenty of that lately. we were determined to be “the most dangerously drunk state.” –woohoo! we’re number one! we’re number one! and in order to maintain our status it’s been on the news a lot lately that they’re trying to pass a bill or whatever to allow the sale of wine in grocery stores and to allow the sale of alcohol on sundays! god bless america!

oh and today i heard that leading the nation in suicides is las vegas. ok that makes sense. and 2nd?.. colorado springs! huh?! ok springers, you may want to focus a little less on the family (inside joke), and your rampant religious-right homophobia, and help people with their depression and self-esteem issues. just a suggestion.. denver was 8th on the list, btw. i bet most of those people were trying to buy a house.

just kidding! ok sorry, that was possibly in poor taste. guess i’m out of practice!

• Sawyer to Crazy John Lock after hearing that John was following the orders of “taller ghost Walt,” (and that’s a hilarious quote in itself) – “..and you didn’t ask any follow up questions?!”

hahahahahahahahaha!! Sawyer, this is why we love you! i wouldn’t go so far as to say you are the voice of reason on LOST but you are often the voice of the few reasonable people still watching this show. do you know how many times we have yelled that at the television while watching this lunacy? i say Sawyer for president! or at least he should overthrow doctor Jack ass on the island.

• Aubrey to Bret Michaels to qualify her statement that she is a really, really, really observant person – “I’m a karaoke host, I know people.”

hahahahahahahahaha! i don’t even know what that means but it’s hilarious! and she meant that shit when she said it! it was almost as funny as her falling on her sword for kristy jo and blubbering about the amazing gift she just gave when she wasn’t gettin’ a pass anyway!

• Me to my knitting teacher, ten minutes into the first class – “Knitting is hard.”

okay this isn’t really funny because it’s true! i did manage to knit & pearl my way thru my whole skein of yarn (and even learn a little lingo), but ummm, well, knitting is hard.

ok, that might be an overstatement.. more accurately i’m taking a knitting class. it’s two hours this evening and two hours next tuesday. we’ll see how it goes…

btw, there has been tons of legal drama surrounding britney in the last two days – restraining orders, accusations, disputes over who the conservator of her estate is, and even who her actual attorneys are at this point. but i’m off the britney train (wreck), at least for now. i hope the girl is getting the help she needs.

what?!! i’m not completely without compassion! geesh!

– you didn’t think i was going to talk about the presidential primary did you?
(i’m not even willing to say “go o’bama,” because, let’s face it, sometimes my support is the kiss of death. but i am NOT taking responsibility for the patriots, they survived my bad juju three previous times so clearly it’s giselle’s fault!)